Envy, relief, and the two feelings at once

It is the most quoted paragraph in the fandom literature and it came out of consumer research rather than psychology, which tells you something. The two feelings are not a contradiction to be resolved. They are the ordinary texture of wanting a thing that cannot be had, and most people have never been asked to describe it because nobody thought it was strange.

Consideration. The part where somebody stops and thinks. The research, the diagnosis, the ethics, the lawsuits, the regulators. Roughly fifty years of arguing with itself about whether this is a relationship.